What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

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Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What is the best way to end a relationship with someone who has future plans with you?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

What's your favourite porn video to jerk off to?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Why is my vagina swollen, it’s very itchy. I had sex we used protection, but day after it felt like my insides had a heartbeat as well as itching, the pulsing has went away but it is still itchy and my discharge is yellow, i'm 15, what could it be?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Do people really never face any hidden costs or surprises with surgeries in countries with single-payer healthcare like the NHS?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Can you write a poem or short story based on the first image that shows up on Pinterest?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Why am I not attracted to masculine men? Why do I like more feminine attributes on a man?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Make Nazis afraid again!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Why are so many people anti-Trump? People didn't like Obama either, but he was the president, so people didn't do this. What makes Trump different?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

What are some best sources of great porn?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Is it true that most people in Québec are bilingual in French and English? If so, why do they often identify as monolingual?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

What do you think about the NFA full auto band? Weapons built before 1986 can be transferred and registered? But we can't have an 87? But older weapons tend to be far more powerful. I think we should drop it. Input?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!